


Tutoring

by Mamamia_51



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 03:54:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7206659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mamamia_51/pseuds/Mamamia_51
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"So, I know Mr. Shurley said this was for English," Dean spoke, making Castiel's stomach flutter. How could a voice do that? He thought. "But I was going to ask you to- uh-" he rummaged in his backpack and took out a crumbled piece of paper. "Do you take Latin? And I also need help with Math." Castiel squinted his eyes, thinking for a moment.<br/>"You take Latin?" He sounded impressed and surprised.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dean was straight.

Castiel knew this...and he reminded himself that everyday he saw Dean Winchester in his first, fourth, and eighth hour class.

Castiel was invisible. He almost never talked, he never raised his hand, and he was always looking down at his desk- drawing or reading. Well, he was invisible to everyone except for the group of ass-hats that would torment him. Who are these people? One's the rich foreigner, who's father owns a company called H€LL, Crowley. Another is Azazel, who's a drug dealer that constantly makes unfair deals with the stoners, but they're too high to actually realize that they're making a crap deal. And then there's Lucifer, the name is fitting since he's a devil in disguise.

Castiel didn't care that he was constantly getting made fun of by Crowley & Co. He tried not to let it get to him, he tried to avoid them, but they found him...they _always_ found him.

But what was Castiel's true problem? Maybe it was that he couldn't be gay. He couldn't _like_ Dean Winchester. He _had_ to stay invisible.

He wouldn't say his life was terrible. He would however say he constantly wish he lived somewhere else. He wanted to live in the city, which he always thought was cliché, but he couldn't get the thought of tall buildings and new people out of his head. Honestly he just wanted to move, to be somewhere he could be himself, he wanted to to escape his brother's overbearing rules.

But Dean? God, Castiel wanted Dean Winchester. He wanted to feel Dean's hand in his, he wanted Dean's lips on his own, and he wanted to live out his city dreams with Dean. That's what he was thinking about when his fourth hour teacher Mr. Shurley called on him.

It was English, Castiel's best subject, but he wasn't paying attention, he was drawing the skyline of Chicago. Mr. Shurley said his name, Castiel knew he heard his name, but that was it. He looked up and squinted his eyes.

"What?" He asked. The class started laughing. Mr. Shurley stepped closer, he had a disapproving look spread across his face.

"Well Castiel, if you were paying attention instead of daydreaming," he cocked his head to the side, "you'd know I asked why Winston decided he loved Big Brother in the end of the book," They had just read the book _1984_ by George Orwell. Castiel liked the book...back in seventh grade when he actually read the book. Now it was below his reading level and bored him beyond belief.

"I think that he was pushed past the natural human boundaries and he couldn't handle the things Big Brother was doing to him. Then eventually he had to make the pain go away by any method necessary, so he gave up the idea of hating Big Brother." Mr. Shurley stared at him a moment.

"You think it was his choice?" He asked. Castiel shook his head.

"No." He said it like it was obvious. To anyone but Mr. Shurley and a select few it would sound rude, but in truth Castiel just wasn't a _"people person"_.

"I think he didn't have a say in it. I think there was nothing else he could've done. It was either fight Big Brother or join them, and he couldn't fight them anymore, physically, mentally, or emotionally." Mr. Shurley nodded his head.

"That's very insightful, Castiel." The teacher praised. Castiel just realized the stares from the rest of his class. He looked slightly to the right, his eyes connected with a pair of gorgeous green ones, he quickly looked back down at his doodles and grabbed his pencil, holding it over the drawing, trying to hide his blush. Castiel didn't like people looking at him.

He couldn't stop thinking of Dean's eyes. _He looked at me,_ he thought to himself. He treasured the small moment before realization hit him. _Holy shit, what if he decided I was a nerd? Well... I should be proud of that, shouldn't I? It's what's going to get me to college and out of my brother's house._ He couldn't get the panic of what Dean might've been thinking out of his mind. In fact he was so anxious he didn't hear another word of his class, not until the bell rang. He breathed out a sigh of relief and gathered his stuff.

"Castiel, can you stay a moment?" Mr. Shurley asked. The boy stopped in front of the door and turned around. He walked up to the teachers desk, he was afraid he was in trouble for not paying attention in class earlier. "Castiel, do you know you're one of my best students?" Castiel mentally thanked God this wasn't anything bad. Castiel said that he knew he was a good student, but never imagined being _that_ good. "You are, in fact I'm surprised you haven't enrolled yourself in one of my advanced classes." Castiel shrugged.

"I-uh-didn't want the extra homework if I'm being honest. I have to help my brothers with theirs, and I do my own, then I got to work part-time at the Burger Shack." Mr. Shurley nodded with a sympathetic look plastered on his face.

"I see," he hummed, "well I was going to ask you if you could tutor a student that might fail this class, but if you're too busy-"

"Actually I wouldn't mind it. I mean I have some free time, I don't mind helping other people, if they have this class it'll be fine." He gave a small smile. Mr. Shurley looked unsure.

"Are you certain?" He asked.

"Oh yeah, it just has to be on Tuesday or Thursday." Castiel returned. Those were they days he had off of work. Mr. Shurley smiled and nodded his head.

"Of course, here, I'll give you the name of the student you'll be helping, and then I'll tell him to meet you Tuesdays after school. You two can decide how long you'll be meeting for yourselves." Castiel smiled and grabbed the paper his teacher was handing him. Castiel thanked Mr. Shurley and walked out. His next class was lunch, so he didn't care how late he'd be.

When Castiel stepped outside he looked at the paper. There were only two words that stood out to him:

Dean Winchester.

_Shit._


	2. Chapter 2

Castiel looked at the name as he walked to the lunch room. He wanted to know if being Dean Winchester's new tutor was a blessing or a curse. He was about half way to his locker when he heard a voice call out.

"Hey, fag!" He stopped as he realized the Scottish tone. _No, they've never bothered me here before._ He didn't even know why they called him gay, they had no reason to believe that was his actual sexuality, no one could've suspected...not even Michael thought he was really gay.

He heard to heels of Crowley's shoes clicking as he walked closer to Castiel. "Didn't plan on seeing you here." Crowley's arm found itself slung over Castiel's shoulder. Castiel was brought into Crowley'd body, throwing him off balance. Crowley was on the football team, he had pounds of muscle and wasn't gentle on the blue eyed boy, even putting his arm around Castiel felt like a punch to his shoulders. "Tell me, queer," he whispered. "What are you doing?" He breathed on Castiel's neck, making chills run down his spine.

"I had to stay late last hour. I'm heading to lunch." Castiel mumbled back, he tried to escape the Scottish boy's (practically) choke hold, but Crowley's grip was too strong. Crowley's followers Lucifer and Azazel were surrounding them. 

"Oh, no, I don't think so." Castiel looked at the taller boys in confusion. They just smiled back. "I think we should go outside."

Castiel didn't like the idea of being outside of the safety of his school. He tried to pull away from the gang of boys, but they were stronger than he was, and there were three of them. They dragged him outside of the school and into the alley that was next door. When they let Castiel go, he scrambled away and they laughed.

"You can't run, fag." Lucifer snarled. Castiel looked behind him, there was only a brick wall, a trash bin, and littered garbage everywhere. "Unless you can go through walls, you're ours." Castiel gulped and his heart began to race. Azazel and Lucifer slowly walked toward Castiel, knowing he couldn't fight back. The now frightened boy backed up, prolonging the attack that was sure to ensue. Castiel walked away from the two boys until his back hit the wall, he was startled, then he turned back to being afraid as the boys were upon him.

Lucifer and Azazel each grabbed one of Castiel's arms, then made him kneel as they pulled back harshly, making Castiel feel like his shoulders were about to pop out. But then Crowley came up and made Castiel forget about that pain. He punched Castiel in the jaw, then kneed him in the chin, sending his head backwards. Crowley grabbed the boy's dark hair and pulled his bruised face forward.

"I bet you like being on your knees, don't you, cock sucker?" Castiel felt warm blood drip down his chin. He muttered for him to stop. "What was that?" Crowley asked. "Are you begging?" He laughed, as did the boys still pulling his arms back. Suddenly Crowley sent a hard kick to Castiel's stomach. Lucifer and Azazel let go of his arms, Castiel curled into a ball and moaned. Anther kick hit Castiel's ribs.

Castiel couldn't move, he could hardly breathe, but he could hear a sudden call from the opening of the alley. _"Azazel?"_ Castiel thought he recognized the voice, but couldn't place it. He saw the three tormenting boys look at each other.

Crowley gestured to the opening with his head. "Well, go see who it is, we'll make sure the queer doesn't talk." Azazel nodded and walked to the front of the alley. A few minutes passed before Azazel came back. "Who was it?" Crowley asked.

"Winchester. Guess he's gonna turn into a regular, says he's been talking to Ash." Castiel took this by surprise, he didn't think Dean was a junkie, to be honest, despite being in a bunch of pain, he was a little turned off by the new found interest of the green eyed beauty. "Left before he lit up though, said class was starting soon." The three boys stood up.

"Then let's go, leave this pussy here. He ain't gonna move for a while." Crowley sent another kick to Castiel's stomach. "Are you, fag?" Castiel groaned a response, the boys laughed and walked out of the alley.

Castiel laid on the ground for a minute before he started finally looking down at himself; his clothes were dirty and a bit torn, he wiped blood from his nose and mouth, and tried to stand up. He fell and coughed after having to the air knocked from him. He was about to try again, but he heard footsteps approaching.

"Stop." He croaked, afraid of Crowley or one of the others coming back to hurt him. A pair of boots stopped in front of his face, he looked up, but couldn't see who it was, all he saw was a pair of jeans and a plaid shirt. _Who the hell wears plaid in the spring time?_ When the thought crossed his mind, he knew he shouldn't be thinking of that, he should've been more scared of what would happen. He was vulnerable and couldn't stand.

"Dude..." The voice sounded sad. Castiel knew then that the person wouldn't hurt him. "Shit, they fucked you up pretty bad." The person crouched down next to Castiel's face. That's when he saw him, Dean Winchester.

Dean quickly pressed his hand to Castiel's face, the boy felt a knotting in his stomach, he pulled away from Dean, trying to sit up. Castiel couldn't sit up however, so Dean helped. "I'm sorry dude, if I knew what they were doing I would've came and helped you." Castiel let out a ragged sigh.

"Too busy getting high?" He asked roughly. Dean frowned.

"I thought they were up to something, I didn't know they-"

"Kicked the shit out of me?" Castiel laughed. Usually he'd be shyer and less eager to talk, but for some reason the blood dripping down his face made him just not care.

"I'm sorry." Dean apologized. Castiel shook his head, he didn't understand why he was saying these things, Dean didn't beat him up. Dean grabbed Castiel's shoulder. "Can you walk?" Castiel shook his head.

"Not really." He sighed. Dean had a worried expression on his face, he put his hand under Castiel's arm. He pulled up and Castiel whimpered. Dean brought the boy to his feet, but he was having trouble standing. Dean quickly put a hand under his knees and scooped him up. Castiel made a sound, half from pain, half from surprise.

Dean carried the beaten boy to his car. It was a black, hard-top, four door, '67 Chevy Impala... Castiel was impressed. Dean sat Castiel down in his car, then got in the driver seat. When he turned the key in the ignition, a rock song blared from the radio. Dean quickly turned it off and started driving.

"It's Castiel, right?" Dean asked. The other boy nodded his head, although he knew Dean probably couldn't see him. "I'm taking you to the hospital." He said. Castiel panicked.

"No, no, my brother will kill me." Dean looked over.

"What?"

"He doesn't like it when we get in trouble." Castiel returned. Dean looked at him like he was insane.

"This isn't your fault. You're hurt. You need a doctor." It seemed like he started driving faster. Castiel's adrenalin stated to wear off and the pain in his abdomen and face intensified. He was also beginning to realize that Dean Winchester, the man he loved, the man that he he would sin for, was driving him in his car.

Time passed and they finally reached the hospital. Dean asked if Castiel could walk yet, he said he could, but when he tried he stumbled and Dean decided it would be best if he helped Castiel. They walked into the emergency room, automatically a nurse came up to them and asked what happened as she lead them to a bed. Dean explained that he just found Castiel in the alley. He didn't say anything about Crowley, Azazel, or Lucifer, so Castiel decided he wouldn't talk about them either. It would probably save him from further torment later anyway.

When the nurse said they had to file a police report, Dean looked worried, but agreed and told the woman to get the papers. Right when the nurse left Dean bent down by Castiel. "Listen, I'm sorry, but I can't have my name tied to this, my uNike would get seriously pissed." Castiel knew where this was going. "I gotta leave, I'm sorry." Castiel frowned but nodded his head. Dean turned around, but Castiel remembered something and called for him. "What is it?"

"I'm your new tutor by the way." Dean smiled.

"Then I'll see you Tuesday?" Castiel nodded. Dean smiled, turned back around, and walked off, leaving Castiel to deal with the nurse and the police report.


	3. Chapter 3

Castiel had a broken rib, a bruised jaw, a chipped tooth, a concussion, and an angry brother.

Michael didn't yell at the hospital, in fact he seemed concerned, as did his other two brothers who came after their school let out. They were Gabriel and Balthazar. Michael wanted to know who hurt Castiel, but the just said that he didn't see his attacker. He also lied about why he went outside. He said he needed fresh air. And when the matter of Dean Winchester came to pass, Castiel just simply denied ever seeing him. Castiel couldn't lie about possibly blacking out, but he didn't talk to the nurse till after Dean had left, so he just told the nurse and the police that he didn't remember the handsome man who brought him in.

Castiel was released at night. He was told to take it easy and given pain killers, then Michael drove all three of the brothers home.

"Who did this to you?" Michael asked when they made it home and the two youngest brothers went to their rooms. Castiel limped to the couch and laid down. Michael kept asking to only have Castiel reply with the same thing.

"I told you, I didn't see his face." Castiel replied. Michael lifted up Castiel's feet, sat down, and then replaced Castiel's legs across his lap. Michael sighed and looked at Castiel.

"Are you trying to tell me someone just decided to beat the crap out of you?" Michael asked.

"They thought I had money, I already said this."

"What about all those bruises I've seen before? What about those cuts? Are you saying these aren't connected?" Michael was smarter than Castiel liked. Not that he would admit it. 

"They aren't." Castiel didn't know why he was protecting Crowley & Co. He just thought that everything would get worse if he told the truth, it always did. Once Crowley found out that Castiel told one of his teachers that he was being bullied, and that's when Crowley started physically hurting Castiel.

"Cassie, listen, these people or person will never hurt you agian. If you get them on an assault charge they'll be kicked out of shcool, they might even go to jail. Just tell me who it is." Castiel thought of it for a second, the only thing that was really preventing Castiel from telling his brother about his attackers was Dean. _Why hadn't Dean told the nurse?_ There had to be a reason, he wasn't protecting Crowley, there was no reason he'd protect him.

"I got those bruises from falling and running into things. I just got mugged. There's nothing in common, I just have..." he paused, "bad luck." Michael seemed to know he was lying, but he didn't say anything. _I should tell Michel. I should.._

_..No..._

Both of the brothers fell asleep on the couch.

When Castiel woke up Gabriel and Balthazar had already left to catch their bus. Michael was sitting on the counter in the kitchen, he was eating a bowl of cereal. Castiel sat up and groaned in pain. He sauntered to the kitchen and took one of his painkillers. Michael didn't talk to him, he just looked on with a frown. A few minutes passed and Michael put his bowl away. Castiel knew they'd both have to leave for school soon.

"I'm leavening, I have to get in early to study." Michael was enrolled in the community college in the city. Castiel nodded his head. "And you're staying home, I already called the school."

"What? I can't miss school. I have a big math test today." Michael sent him a glare.

"I refuse to argue about this, you're not going to school. Just wait another day, you look like shit, and I'm sure you feel like it too." Castiel sighed and grabbed a soda from the refrigerator. Michael stopped in front of Castiel, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Don't take more than the prescribed amount of pills, and please stay in the house. Also Gabriel and Balthazar are pretty freaked out about what happened to you, so just, don't do anything weird." Castiel just nodded his head. "I'll see you later, Cassie." Michael smiled and walked out the door.

Castiel limped back to the couch, turned on the television, and drank his soda- trying to pass the time.

It was a little past noon when Castiel's phone rang. He groaned, thinking it was his brother checking up on him, but when he reached for the cellphone, an unknown number showed up. Castiel was confused, but picked the phone up and answered. "Hello?" He heard a breath release form the other side.

"Hey, Castiel." The boy recognized the voice.

"Dean?" Castiel sat up, but regretted it when pain shot through his side. He let out a whimper.

"You okay?" Dean asked, his voice laced with concern.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. How'd you get this number?" Dean chuckled.

"Uh, Mr. Shurley just told me your my tutor, then he gave me your number to schedule appointments." Castiel started to realize that his cheeks were heating up, he wondered how he'll be able to help Dean when he can't even have a regular conversation with the guy.

"Oh, okay."

"Yeah, you weren't here today so I actually wanted to know how you were feeling." Castiel blushed again.

"Not too good, but I'll be fine." Castiel returned. "I have a broken rib and a concussion." He heard Dean say something under his breath, but wasn't able to catch what it was.

"I'm sorry, I should've stopped them. I should've done something." Castiel shook his head.

"No, no, it wasn't your fault." Castiel reassured.

"Have they done it before?"

"Not this bad, I was running late to lunch, they...found me." Dean murmured again, he sounded angry. Castiel didn't understand why suddenly Dean knew of his existence and was upset by the bullying he's faced for years. There was silence for a while, but then Castiel heard a bell ring, he looked at the clock and assumed it was signaling the end of the period.

"Listen, Cas, I gotta go. Just- if they do anything...tell me, okay?" Castiel was about to respond, but the line started beeping, showing that Dean had hung up. Castiel had a smile on his face. He turned off his phone and threw it to the side.

_Jesus Christ, Dean Winchester just called me._


	4. Chapter 4

The next day Castiel went to school.

Michael wasn't sure about his decision, but Castiel just said that he'd be fine, and call if he wasn't.

Michael was unnaturally nice to Castiel. He knew it was because he was hurt, usually Michael would yell at Castiel for being a coward and not fighting back, but today Michel was nice enough to give Castiel a ride. He said he was worried about Castiel's broken rib on a bumpy school bus. He was also afraid, but didn't say it aloud, that perhaps the person who beat Castiel up was on his bus. The ride to the school was quiet and only a few exchanges of words were given between the two. When they got to the school Castiel thanked Michael for the ride and walked inside. He stopped by his locker to get an extra book, then went to his first hour class.

The first thing that Castiel saw when he walked into his classroom was that his seat was being sat in.

Correction: His seat was being sat in by a tall, muscle covered, auburn haired, green eyed, freckled faced teenager.

_Shit._  Castiel thought to himself as he walked to the chair. Dean smiled up at him. Castiel felt heat rise up to his ears, he wasn't good in social situations, it wasn't that he was anti-social, it was just that he didn't know what to say... _ever_.

"Heya, Cas." Dean said, his eyes shinning.

"Uh-hello." Castiel greeted. Dean's smiled faded and Castiel wished it hadn't.

"You look terrible." Castiel already knew this. He had a bruise on his jaw and apparently he got kicked in the face, but hadn't known it, so now there were two dark circles under his eyes. Castiel shrugged. Dean got out of his seat and Castiel went down in the chair, then Dean sat down on his desk. "So Mr. Shurley said you were free Tuesdays and Thursdays." Dean looked at Castiel. The blue eyed boy nodded. "Okay, well can we meet after school on Thursday, because on Tuesdays I have to work at my uncle's auto shop." Castiel was impressed that Dean had an _actual_ job that required _actual_ skill.

"Yeah sure, do you have like a time you want to end?" Castiel got out his planner and started writing down his tutoring lesson. Dean chuckled lowly at him.

"Whatever time's good for you, Cas." He smiled, Castiel looked up and connected eyes with Dean. He blushed and looked down again, Dean bit his lip, the bell rang, and Dean got off of the desk. "See ya later." He winked and walked away. Castiel was very confused, he felt his heart pounding and his cheeks heating up. He had to remind himself he shouldn't be thinking of Dean that way, especially since he was his tutor now. _He was flirting though, right?_ Castiel wasn't a people person, he didn't know these kind of things unless they were in movies. All he knew for sure was that Dean Winchester was straight, so he couldn't have been flirting with him. 

The rest of the day went by fast, in fourth hour Castiel felt like someone was looking at him. It made him uneasy, but for some reason it kind of made feel more alive, like he was actually _there_ for once. Of course he automatically thought he was being a bit self-centered, who would look at him? After that he ate lunch. He went outside like usual, he was alone, but he was always alone. He didn't mind being alone like some would, he enjoyed the time to think. Today it was about Dean Winchester. He was a little scared knowing he'd have to talk with the boy he had a crush on since freshmen year.

When the bell rang Castiel grabbed his trash and threw it out. He stepped out of the lunchroom knowing what to expect.

"Hey, fag." An arm wrapped around his shoulder, it was harsh and made his rib throb with pain. Castiel's breath hitched. He heard laughed from behind him. "So, I trust you didn't say anything about us, right?" Crowley's voice hissed in Castiel's ear.

"I didn't." Castiel said through clenched teeth.

"Good, good. Because, what we just did to you, that was for fun." He threw Castiel against a locker, making his rib feel like it just broke again, it also made his head pound. He fell to the ground. He looked around and wondered how Crowley could find a mostly empty hallway in the middle of a passing period. The only people that were there averted their eyes and walked a little faster. "If you dare say our names to anyone we'll kill you. We'll beat the living shit out of you and you'll be left on the floor, bloody and bruised."Castiel tried to get up, feeling more pain shoot through him. Crowley stood over him and smiled. "You understand, don't you?" He asked. Castiel nodded, but Crowley put his foot on top of his head, pressing his skull into the floor. "I asked if you understood." His voice was emotionless.

"Yes." Castiel stated. Crowley laughed, lifted his foot up, and walked away.

Castiel was late to his next class. When asked why he was late he said that he had to use the bathroom and there was a line. He quickly found his seat because he hated that fact that everyone was looking at him. His teacher looked like she knew it was a lie, but didn't question it farther.

Throughout the rest of the day the pain in Castiel's side got worse. By eighth hour he had a serious limp and wished he had brought his painkillers to school. He sat hunched over with his arms hugging his chest. He stayed like that the whole hour. When the bell rang he was the last to leave the room and he gripped to his ribcage, which hurt, but felt nicer since he assumed he was pushing it back into place or something of the sort. He stepped out of the class and felt a person come up next to him. He looked over and saw Dean.

"What's wrong?" He asked sternly. Castiel shook his head, remembering the words of Crowley.

"I'm fine." He returned. He arrived at his locker and gathered his stuff. Dean stopped Castiel from walking past him.

"What happened?" He asked. Castiel shook his head again, wondering why Dean cared. "Hey, was it Crowley?" Dean asked.

"It's nothing, Dean." He tried to get past him, but Dean stepped in the way. Dean's eyes darted to the side, Castiel looked back, there was a bathroom there. Castiel had hated having his locker next to a bathroom, but sometimes it was actually good if Castiel was in a rush and had to go. He was about to ask why Dean looked over, but was interrupted by being dragged inside the restroom. "What are you doing?" He asked startled when the door closed. He wasn't going to mention that pulling him inside had hurt his rib and just about everything else.

"Lift up your shirt." Dean ordered. Castiel blushed and looked around.

"What? No." He replied back quickly. Dean rolled his eyes and shoved Castiel into a stall, it was the handicap one so they had some space. Dean locked the door.

"Lift up your shirt." Castiel declined again, but Dean ran up to him and lifted it up. Castiel tried pushing it back down, but Dean was _a lot_ stronger than he was. There was a bruise covering the right side of Castiel's chest, there was also a small lump where Castiel knew his rib was broken. "Jesus, Cas." Dean grimaced. Castiel stepped away and lowered his shirt. "Did they do that to you?" Dean asked. "Again?" Castiel went to leave, but Dean's hand covered his. He looked at him. "Cas..."

"Why do you even care?" Castiel snapped. "You barely even know me."

"That's not true, you're my tutor." He answered. Castiel unlocked the door.

"Then I'll see you after school tomorrow." He opened the stall door and walked out.


	5. Chapter 5

Castiel started taking a pill every four hours. It was the highest dosage there was, the doctor had said Castiel wouldn't need to ever take that much, but with what Crowley did to Castiel he was in constant pain and didn't want to tell his brother. Not only would mentioning his intensified pain make Michael look at him like he was a coward, but he would also most likely have to tell the doctor or his brother about Crowley, and he did not want to do that. 

It was Thursday and Castiel had a tutoring session with Dean. He was apprehensive, mostly because of yesterday. Dean knew one of Castiel's biggest secrets at the moment and he was scared about that. Castiel actually thought that Dean might not come, but he saw him in the classes they had together so he wasn't certain of anything. Dean would catch Castiel's eye, but he'd look away really quick, like he didn't want Castiel to know he was looking. Castiel was also contemplating not going to the library to tutor Dean, although he decided against it. _Dean probably won't even come, at least I can read for an extra hour._

By the end of the day Castiel had taken two more pills. He was in a calm state, it was nice for him, he hated being stressed, and his anxiety rarely let Castiel feel as good as he did now. He made his way to the library and sat down at a table. Dean wasn't there so he took out a copy of _Fahrenheit 451_ and started reading. So far he was enjoying the book, but didn't quite understand the importance of the "mutt".

He only got halfway through the page he was on when he heard the chair across from him scratch against the ground. He looked up at the person who sat down in the seat across from him only to see Dean Winchester.

"Oh, hello, Dean." Castiel greeted. Dean looked angry, but also sad.

"Hey, Cas."

There was silence after that. It was heavy and uncomfortable. Castiel's mind started to fill with uneasiness. He looked at Dean and instantly felt nervous. He was about to say something, anything that came to his mind, but instead Dean started to talk. 

"So, I know Mr. Shurley said this was for English," Dean spoke, making Castiel's stomach flutter. _How could a voice do that?_   He thought. "But I was going to ask you to -uh-" he rummaged in his backpack and took out a crumbled piece of paper. "Do you take Latin? And I also need help in Math." Castiel squinted his eyes, thinking for a moment.

"You take Latin?" He sounded impressed and surprised.

"Well, actually I'm failing Latin." Dean half smiled.

"Why don't you just switch to spanish or something?" Castiel asked. Dean shook his head.

"My dad wanted me to learn it a long time ago, and my brothers a freaking genius, so he's blowing right through it easily." Castiel nodded, understanding. He was amazing at school work, but his family was big on football and baseball. Sadly Castiel just wasn't athletic, so Michael and Balthazar (not Gabriel, although he was a soccer superstar) made fun of him a lot, making him feel depressed and worthless. Castiel knew where Dean was coming from.

"Yeah, I can help you." Castiel told Dean. Dean smiled and started taking out textbooks. _He isn't going to mention yesterday?_   _Or anything? Just tutoring?_ Castiel couldn't believe it. _Whatever._

Castiel took out his own textbooks, he didn't have the Latin one because he had finished his courses, and was now taking advanced Enochian. His Math and English textbooks were normal because he decided to take the regular classes, but he assumed taking the AP Foreign Languages would help him learn more in a short period of time.

"Do you want to start with English? We have that big test on _1984_ in a week."

Dean nodded. "Yeah, believe it or not, but I'm doing worse in that than Math." He laughed. Castiel was a bit suprised, he had a lower grade in math, he thought everyone did. His grade was only worse than everything else by .75%. He still had an A of course though. Castiel shrugged and told him they should review on the topics Mr. Shurley said would most likely be on the test. Dean kinda did a half laugh. "Uh, actually I never read the book." Dean said. Castiel looked at him with wide eyes.

"How didn't you read it?" Castiel asked.

"It was boring as hell." Dean laughed. Castiel's stomach did a sorta flip thing, which made him feel strange.

"I liked it."

"Yeah, because you're the type of person who would like it." Dean returned.

"What is that suppose to mean?"

"Big Brother has total control of you, Cas." Castiel shook his head, showing he didn't understand.

"So you did read it?" He asked.

"No."

"Then how did you know that?"

"What? About Big Brother? Come on, that's a main character. That's the main idea. Even when I try not to pay attention I hear everything about it." Castiel shrugged, he supposed their class talked about Big Brother a lot.

They spent the next hour going through the main ideas, themes, and Castiel wrote a summery as he read it aloud, making sure Dean could at least get a C on the test. Then they moved on to Math. It was actually pretty easy to help Dean, Castiel just had to go through the steps and Dean took it up easily. Castiel began to realize Dean wasn't just a dumb jock.

Then they moved on to Latin.

"So, what are you guys learning in Latin?" Castiel asked. Dean shrugged.

"Simple phrases." Dean responded. Castiel asked for an example. "Things like, Vos postulo ut videre medicum." Castiel stared at Dean. He said that perfectly.

"I don't need to see a doctor." Castiel returned. That's what Dean had said. "And you don't need help with Latin, not if you can say that. Not when you can say it like that." Dean nodded his head, his face stayed stern.

"I told you, my brother's fluent in it, if I ever did need help, I would ask him." Castiel began to stand up.

"Do you even need help in English or Math?" He asked.

"Mr. Shurley sent you to me, of course I need help." He stood up too. "But you also need help." Castiel shook his head.

"No... I don't." He started to leave. He'd have to walk home, but he didn't care. He heard Dean following him. His rib began to hurt again and he grabbed his bottle of pills. He dumped one into his hand and swallowed it dry.

"How many of those have you taken?" Dean asked from behind him. Castiel started walking faster. "I saw you take one at lunch. You probably took one before you came to school." Castiel ignored Dean and opened the front doors. "That's three in eight hours." Suddenly a hand grabbed Castiel's shoulder and stopped him. "Cas, let me take you to a doctor." Dean's voice was calmer. Castiel threw Dean's hand off.

"Piss off, Dean." He returned then started walking back to his house. He didn't hear Dean try to follow.

Castiel sighed and took the bottle of pills from his backpack again. _Fuck Dean! Fuck him!_ He thought. _I don't give a shit._

He knew that wasn't true though. He knew Dean was right, he knew Dean meant good, he knew he cared even though he barely knew Castiel.

Castiel fucking loved Dean Winchester.

And that's exactly why he took the extra pill.


	6. Chapter 6

Castiel became addicted to tranquility.

Or more, he became addicted to his painkillers. He realized there were quite a lot of them and now he was having one every three hours. For that short time he committed sin after sin. He wasn't himself on the pills, but he liked being someone else. He used to have a life filled with stress and anxiety, yet through the little capsules of relief he found a resemblance of joy. He stopped going to work, his part-time job was already given away to some other shit-head who probably thought they had to prepare for the future. He also started talking with kids at school, which was unlike him, but they were mostly the stoners. His new friend Ash knew Dean, but Castiel never liked talking about him with anybody.

It was only Sunday.

Castiel refused to go to church and Michael was getting angry at him.

"Our family has gone to church every Sunday! You will not stay home!" Michael yelled. Castiel had just taken one of his pills, so he was in a good mood, and was not ready to have that ruined by the bullshit talk of _God_.

"Screw that!" He yelled at Michael. "I'm staying home." Castiel flopped down on the couch and turned on the television. Michael was fuming. He couldn't believe his younger brother was talking to him in such a manner. He was so angry that part of him gave up control.

Michael grabbed Castiel by the front of his shirt in a swift movement. He lifted him up, bringing him close to his face. "You will do what I say!" Michael yelled. Castiel didn't say anything, but there was barely any time to actually say something, because Michael threw Castiel to the ground. Castiel's fragile rib made a cracking sound, he quickly curled up and gave a groan that turned into a cough. Gabriel was beside Castiel in a second.

"Stop it, Michael!" He yelled.

Michael seemed to snap out of his trance and looked back at Balthazar, who just seemed shocked, but didn't move. The older brother quickly grabbed a stunned Balthazar by the sleeve of his shirt and started dragging him to the door.

"Gabriel, come on, we're going to church!" Gabriel gave Castiel a sad look and gazed back toward the opening Michael had just left out of. Castiel noticed and sat up trying his hardest not to whimper in pain.

"Go on, don't end up like me." It was a half joke, but also very serious. Gabriel made a conflicted face and nodded slowly. He got up and Michael let out another yell for him to hurry, Gabe flinched at the harsh words and said goodbye to Castiel, then he was gone.

Castiel took another pill when they had left.

 

When the three brothers returned from church Michael didn't even look at Castiel. Balthazar and Gabriel sat down next to him on the couch, they asked how he was. He said he was fine, the same word he'd use when teachers asked how he was, or back when his brother would ask how his day went. Gabe leaned his head on Castiel's shoulder, he was sad. This time Casteil asked how he was.

"Michael never hit before." Gabriel sighed. That wasn't true, although Castiel wouldn't say it. Michel never hit him in front of _them_ before. Castiel shrugged.

"It'll be okay." Castiel returned, not knowing if it were true.

 

On Monday Michael kept ignoring Castiel. Michael always ignored his brother after he hit him. That didn't stop Castiel from taking a pill every two hours.

Castiel's grades weren't getting effected by his new found addiction. It seemed no matter what Castiel was on, he was just too smart. He wasn't the only smart one though, his friend Ash was a hidden genius. No one expected a druggie to be the next Einstein, but there he was, sitting next to Castiel outside before school, smoking weed and not caring.

"So, I was thinking about two ends of a wormhole, right? And I was envisioning the two ends in the same spot of space, but like in different times, say a year or two apart. But because the wormhole connects it, it would only take a few minutes to travel throughout time-space. Anyway, maybe the key to time travel is wormholes, not those idiotic machines they show in the movies and stuff." Castiel listened to Ash. He nodded, then looked at the other boy. "Make a wormhole, a connection of a black and white hole, and you'll be able to travel anywhere at anytime."

"You're high." Castiel stated. This was classic weed induced speak for Ash.

"Um, yeah." Ash nodded. He kept nodding as he stared off into space.

There were only a few minutes before the bell rang and Castiel knew he had to leave soon. He was about to tell the other boy he was going to go, when he heard a voice call out Ash's name. He looked back and saw Dean Winchester.

"Hey, listen, Ash, I gotta run. I'll see you later." Casteil stood up. Ash turned to him and stuck out a hand, inside it was a bag of pot. Dean stopped in front of them and saw the exchange. Castiel rolled his eyes, Ash had been trying to push weed on him for a while, usually Castiel refused. However this time he wanted to get out of there as quick as possible, so he took the bag and rushed off to class. Dean looked disappointed. _He has no right to be, he doesn't know me._

Before Castiel could get to class he ran into someone. He fell to the ground, hurting his side. The small bag of contraband slipped out of his grasp, he quickly scurried towards it, but a foot stomped down on his hand, making Castiel produce a pained sound and try to pull back. "What's that, fag?" A Scottish voice asked from above. _Come on! Did it have to be them?_   The foot lifted from Castiel's hand and he pulled back, cradling it in his other hand. Crowley bent down and picked up the baggie. "Hey, Az, this your stuff?"

Azazel walked up to Crowley and frowned at the plastic bag. "Looks like it." He said. Azazel turned his attention to Castiel. "How the hell did you get this? I don't sell to queers." Castiel stood up.

"I'm not gay," Castiel hissed. _Lie_. "And it's not even mine, I was holding it for someone." _Not totally a lie_. Crowley  & Co. laughed.

"Well that has to be right, because a pussy like you doesn't do drugs." Azazel smirked. Castiel shook his head and tried to shove passed them. "Where do you think you're going?" Lucifer's arm blocked Castiel's escape.

"I have to get to class." Castiel muttered.

"I don't know, fag, maybe you should start skipping." Crowley smirked. Castiel tried to get past them again, but Lucifer wrapped his other arm around him an threw him against the wall of lockers. Castiel groaned, feeling his head and back erupt with pain.

Crowley went back and picked Castiel up by the collar of his shirt. Crowley said something that he couldn't hear. Castiel was angry, which was odd, he prided himself on the fact that he was very calm in tense situations...but now Castiel was infuriated .

Crowley pushed him back into the lockers. Castiel growled...  _actually_ growled, like a dog. The group looked at him confused, then they lost their train of thought as the bell rang. _Fuck, I'm going to be late because of these fucking assholes_. Castiel stuck his hands out a shoved Crowley away with all his strength and he took a few steps, mostly out of shock.

"Oh, the fag's got some fight." Crowley sneered. "That's fun." He laughed. Castiel stood up and looked for an exit.

There was none.

Crowley threw a punch, but Castiel ducked and charged, wrapping his hands around the other boys middle and pushing him to the ground. Lucifer and Azazel were on top of Castiel before he knew it, but Castiel elbowed the one grabbing his right arm in the stomach, then reeled back a first and punched the other one in the nose. He bolted, but of course the bot who could make captain of the football team tackled Castiel to the ground. If Castiel wasn't so high on adrenaline he would've noticed the pain in his broken rib more, but he almost didn't feel it. Crowley hit Castiel's face a couple of times, enough to make him taste the blood starting to fill his mouth. He brought his knee up to where Crowley's chest was and quickly kicked. Throwing Crowley off of him. He stayed one moment to give Crowley what he assumed would turn out to be a black eye, then ran.

He heard heavy footsteps pounding behind him, he made a sharp turn and went through a door. He tried to calm his breathing so he wouldn't give away his poison. Once he heard Crowley & Co. pass he opened the door and looked both ways. He sauntered over to the bathroom and walked inside. He looked in the mirror, and man, was he a sight. His lip was busted open, there was a cut on his forehead, his eye was bruised, his nose  had to be broken again, and blood covered almost all of his lower face, and trailed down his chin, soaking the top part of his shirt. His adrenaline had finally worn off and he felt throbbing in his side. He lifted his shirt, it actually wasn't that bad, mostly just bruising, but when he touched it a jolt of pain ran through him. He winched and pulled his shirt back down. _Well that lump's gone_ , he thought, _maybe that means the bone's in place_.

He spent the next half hour cleaning the blood from his face. It was surprisingly difficult because his nose had only stopped bleeding five minutes after he arrived in the bathroom, and he kept having to pull back from the pain. He took another one of the pills and finished wiping the blood off.

After he was clean he pulled out his phone and checked how much time he had before the hour was over. It was another thirty two minutes. He sighed and grabbed his backpack, he was lucky enough to keep it on during all the fighting. Castiel wondered if the other boys had skipped class, he thought they'd be stupid not to, Crowley (and he was pretty sure Lucifer) had some sign of a physical altercation on their faces, a lot less than Castiel had, but still, a teacher would take notice. Not only that, but they'd be late and they already showed their fondness of skipping. However there was a chance they could be waiting and wondering the halls, so Castiel didn't want to leave the safety of the bathroom.

Castiel sighed and took out his book, beginning to read as he sat on the sink.

 

Castiel jumped when the bell rang, he gulped and got ready to rush into a stall if other students came in. He was praying the next six minutes were the quickest of his life, that was till his phone rang and he wondered who the hell would be calling him. It was a random number, but Castiel realized it as soon as he saw it. It was Dean's. He answered the phone.

"Hello." He answered. A voice breathed deeply from the other end.

"Cas? Jesus Christ, where the hell are you? I saw you earlier, but you weren't in class." Castiel felt weird at the fact Dean acknowledged he was missing. He always thought he was invisible.

"I'm in the bathroom." Castiel returned.

"Doing what? Getting high?" Castiel could tell he was angry. "I saw Ash hand you the fucking bag. What the hell is wrong with you?" Castiel shook his head.

"I didn't smoke it, Ash has been pushing it on me. This was the first time I took it, okay? I just wanted to get out of there."

"Then why are you hiding out in the bathroom?" Dean asked. Castiel didn't answer. He heard Dean mutter something. "Dammit, Cas. Where are you?" Castiel shook his head and squinted his eyes, even though Castiel knew Dean couldn't see the confusion on a face.

"I already told you, I'm in the-"

"No, I meant which one?" Castiel thought about lying, but he looked in the mirror and saw his refection.

"The one by the computer labs."

 

Dean entered the bathroom within a minute after they ended the phone call. Castiel was of course in a stall because he didn't want a stranger seeing him, but when Dean called his name Castiel stuck his head out. Dean only glanced at him for a second before is face fell.

"Cas," His voice was soft and he shook his head and rushed toward Castiel. "What the hell happened to you?" Dean was looking at the blood stains on Castiel's blue t-shirt.

"It was Crowley, mostly." Castiel returned. Dean's face twisted into anger.

"I'm going to kill them." He growled. Castiel put his hands on Dean's shoulders, trying to calm him down.

"It's fine, I don't care. I'm just afraid that they're going to be out there." Castiel seemed rather distressed. Dean looked back at the door, then he took out his phone and checked the time. Castiel read the numbers upside down and saw that there were three more minutes till the passing period was over. Dean sighed and put his phone away. When he looked back up at Castiel his green eyes were sad.

"First of all, Cas, you should care. Those ass-hats shouldn't be able to beat the shit out of you and get away with it. And secondly, why would they still be out there? Shouldn't they be on class? Or, like, ditching school?" Dean appeared confused and Castiel couldn't help but let a small smile smile fall over his lips.

"Well, I kinda punched Crowley in the face... so I think he'll be at least a little angry." Dean gave a laugh.

"Damn, Castiel, didn't know you had it in you." Castiel shook his head and looked down.

"Well, one punch compared to all the ones they gave...." He trailed off. Dean clapped a hand over Castiel's shoulder.

"It's a start."

They sat on the sink counter in silence and waited till the bell rang. Dean told Castiel to come with him. Castiel refused to go to the hospital like Dean had suggested. Dean said that his cuts needed to be disinfected, but still Castiel absolutely rejected the idea. That's when Dean said he had a plan, Castiel didn't ask what it was- he could've cared less, it wasn't like before.

Dean lead them to the black car Castiel remembered from when Dean carried him there. He blushed at the memory, he was starting to feel uncomfortable with Dean being the only who knew out his day-to-day attackings, but it's not like there was anyone else he could tell. Michael would say that he was acting like a pussy and tell him to fight back. Gabriel and Balthazar wouldn't know what to say, probably nothing that'd help. Dean told Castiel to get in.

"Where are we going?" Castiel asked.

"Home." Dean returned. Castiel panicked, thinking he meant the place where Michael would be. Dean obviously saw the worry on Castiel's face. He turned the key in the ignition and talked over the blaring rock music that had just started. "Not your home."


	7. Chapter 7

Deans home wasn't really a house- it was a salvage yard.

Castiel didn't question the odd building, he just followed Dean into what appeared to be a kitchen. Dean told him to sit down in a chair beside the table, Castiel of course obliged. Dean went off somewhere, telling the beaten boy to stay where he was.

Castiel was left to think about everything that happened. How he got the shit kicked out of him, got a concerned call from Dean Winchester, the very same boy that he had (quite a bit of) a crush on, that for some reason cared about what he did with his life because he accidentally witnessed him (yet again) getting the shit kicked out of him. And now? Now he was sitting in Dean's home, ignoring the pain in his face and rib, hoping he doesn't fuck up his (most likely) only chance to talk with the man he wishes to share a profound bond with.

Castiel also thought about how he barley knew anything about Dean. _He has those candied apple green eyes. And those "only found in dreams" pink lips._ His appearance, Castiel realized, was really all he knew about. _Well, he lives in/next to a salvage yard. Oh, and he has to be a good person to help a loser like me_. Castiel couldn't help but wonder if he loved Dean, if he  _truly_   loved Dean.

The thought stayed in Castiel's mind till he saw Dean coming through a doorway with peroxide and cloth tucked under his arm. Castiel felt his stomach do a flip as he flashed a small, semi-sad looking smile toward Dean. The other boy gave a nod and walked over to the table, setting the materials he was carrying on the table. Dean dragged a chair to where he could sit facing Castiel.

Dean didn't say a world as he reached out and grabbed the bottle of peroxide along with a cotton ball. He unscrewed the bottle and dumped some of the contents on the white ball. When he was about to touch the damp end to Castiel's face he paused, "This is gonna sting a little." He warned. Castiel nodded, knowing the pain that comes with disinfecting.

Dean pressed the cotton ball to the cut on Castiel's forehead, he winced and closed his eyes. When Dean pulled away Castiel opened his eyes, looking straight into the green ones in front of him. Quickly he turned his eyes downward as a light blush crossed his cheeks. Dean grabbed another cotton ball and soaked it in the peroxide. "Okay, Cas. One more cut." Dean held his hand under Castiel's chin and lifted his head so he could get a better angle. Castiel knew he should be gushing over the fact that his head was being held by Dean _fucking_ Winchester, but he was, and he was also thinking about Dean calling him Cas. He wondered if it were the first time, but thinking back, he wasn't focused on what Dean was calling him, he was more focused on the fact that Dean was actually _talking_ to him.

Castiel decided he liked the nickname.

Dean pressed the cotton ball to Castiel's lip and it stung more than the cut on his forehead did, but he tried not to let it show. Dean took it away and Castiel sighed.

"Thank you, Dean." Castiel smiled. Dean nodded his head and picked up the other piece of cloth. It was black. Dean tossed it to Castiel. He was about to ask what it was, but Dean interrupted him.

"It's a shirt. I thought you'd want to change out of that bloody one." Castiel looked down at his now red collar. He took the shirt and stood up, getting ready to take off his own. Dean looked for a second, but when he realized what was going on he turned around. Castiel took off his shirt, placed it on the table, and before he could slip the other shirt on, he saw Dean glancing at him out of the corner of his eye. Castiel put the black shirt on and looked back over at Dean, his eyes were facing forward... _not_ at Castiel. Castiel question if his first sight was true or not.  _He couldn't have been looking at me, why would he have?_

"I'm decent." He told Dean as he sat back in the chair. Dean turned around, but he didn't meet Castiel's eye. Castiel sighed and dragged his backpack over to him, then rummaged through one of the pockets and grabbed his pill bottle. He unscrewed it and quickly popped in one of his oval shaped medicines.

"How many of those do you take in a day?" Dean asked, he seemed a bit annoyed. Castiel looked at him after he put the bottle back. _So far I've had about three in two hours._ He didn't say that of course, he just shrugged. "Really?"

"I don't keep track-"

"That's not good, Cas." Dean was getting angrier.

"I take one when I need one." Castiel returned.

"Oh, right, and when you overdose?" His tone was exasperated. 

"I won't overdose, Dean."

The was a long moment of silence where Dean was think about something.

"How many more do you have left?" Castiel didn't know the number off the top of his head, so he went back into his backpack and grabbed the bottle. He unscrewed the top and dumped the pills into his hand. He started counting them by putting them back inside the bottle.  _1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7..._

"Seven." Castiel returned. Dean sighed and put his head in his hands.

"You've taken a lot, Cas. That can't be good for you." Castiel was starting to get angry himself. What right did Dean Winchester, whose practically a stranger, have to tell him what to do?

"That's because I'm in pain, Dean. I need them."

"Jesus, the pain will go away. You-you just have to take less, your going to get addicted. Your wounds will heal." Castiel just laughed.

"It's not just physical pain." Castiel's voice was soft and quiet. 

"What?"

There was silence again. Castiel knew he had said too much, _Dean doesn't want to hear about my problems._ It looked like Dean was about to say something, but then the creaking of a door opening cut him off. Castiel turned around to see an older man, probably in his sixties, with grease covered hands, and a truckers hat on his head.

"Shouldn't you be at school, boy." The man said. Dean let a smile cover his face.

"Priorities, Bobby." Dean chuckled. Bobby shook his head and went to the refrigerator, he came back with a beer.

"Whose your friend?"

"My name is Castiel." The boy returned. Bobby nodded his head and introduced himself, although Castiel already knew his name, so he thought he was just being polite.

"So, Castiel, not to be rude, but what happened to your face?" Castiel gave a quick glance toward Dean.

"He's a boxer." Dean responded. Castiel didn't say anything, he didn't look like a boxer. He was kinda thin, didn't have a lot of muscle, but at the moment he had the face of one, so Castiel assumed it was a decent enough lie.

"Really?" Bobby asked like he knew it was a lie. "Then why is he in my house when he should be in school?" Now Dean looked over at Castiel.

"I-uh... well-uh." Bobby shook his head.

"Never mind." He turned back to Dean. "You still have to pick up Sam, because he actually stays in school." He walked away and headed back to where ever he was before. Castiel turned to Dean with a puzzled face

"Sam's my brother." Dean returned almost as though he could read Castiel's mind. Castiel nodded. "He's in eighth grade, so I have to pick him up from the middle school." Castiel understood, till about a year ago he had to drive his brothers to sports practices and games. His part-time gave him a reason to stop driving back and forth, but since he was fired he was going on the hope that Michael wouldn't find out about both the job and new found free time.

"So, what do you want to do for..." Dean checked his phone for the time. "Just about four hours." Castiel shook his head and said he didn't know.

"I could tutor you." Dean laughed.

"Mihi opus est auxilium?" Dean asked. Castiel shook his head.

"Even though you're fluent in Latin that doesn't mean you don't need help with math and English." Castiel responded.

"God, Cas, I was hoping we could do something fun." Castiel turned slightly pink by his thoughts. _I could think of a lot of fun things to do with you, Dean_.

"Oh, really," Castiel returned. Dean's eyes lingered on Castiel for a few seconds, he had shinning eyes and a faint smile on his lips. He looked in love, same as Castiel, but they couldn't recognize the feeling in each other...

"How about we watch T.V." Dean said standing up. Castiel agreed and followed Dean into a room with a television. Castiel and Dean sat scrolling through the channels till they found _Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope_. Castiel hadn't watched any of the _Star Wars_ movies, but of course he had heard of it and basically knew the whole plot.

After a few minutes of watching the Stormtroopers hit nothing (Castiel decided they have to have the worst aim in the universe) Dean got up and said he was getting a soda. He asked if Castiel wanted one and he told him that it would be nice.

Dean came back with to sodas and handed one to Castiel.

"Thank you, Dean."

Then they watched the movie again. _It's nice and calm, even relaxing._  Castiel thought. 

At the end of the movie Castiel had found out, while sneaking looks at Dean, that he knew almost every line of the movie, and mouthed them to himself. Castiel thought it was cute, but he also wondered how many times Dean had seen any of the  _Star Wars_ movies _._

The next showing was _Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes back_. Dean said that they were lucky because they had enough time to finish the movie before they had to go pick up Sam. Dean seemed to know this movie as well as the other one. Castiel thought it was better than _A New Hope_ , mostly because he knew the plot better. His favorite scene, and Dean's too, was when Darth Vader said, "I am your father."

It wasn't until the credits were rolling that Castiel realized how close him and Dean were sitting. Their knees and shoulders were touching, and their hands were so close together. Castiel could almost intertwine his fingers with Dean's... _almost_. He would've, maybe, if Dean hadn't stood up. Castiel tried to cover up his disappointment and walked behind Dean. They got their backpacks, but before they could leave Castiel told Dean he had to use the restroom.

Castiel opened the door to the small bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. His face had bruised over and there was no more blood, he looked downward and saw Dean's black shirt, he smiled and ran his fingers across the fabric. _This is probably the closest I'll ever be to Dean Winchester_. His smile turned into a frown and he grabbed his backpack, which he was happy he didn't leave outside, and took one of his pills. _Six left._ He thought as he put it away. He flushed the toilet so it seemed like he wasn't doing drugs in Dean's bathroom, then he ran the faucet for a few seconds.

When he stepped out of the bathroom he saw Dean leaning against a door frame. _Damn_. Castiel smiled at him and Dean returned it.

"Come on, we gotta get Sammy." Dean turned and Castiel followed.

They drove for a short while. The rock music blaring and Dean tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. Then they came up to the middle school Castiel remembered. School let out only a few minutes before, but there was only one kid sitting on the pavement reading a book. Dean honked the horn, which made Castiel jump, and then he called out for his brother. The boy looked up, closed his book then walked over.

Sam, Castiel presumed, looked like he was going to go to the passenger seat but once he saw Castiel sitting there, he squinted in confusion and went to the backseat.

"Hey, Dean, who's your friend?" Dean looked over at Castiel and smiled.

"Sam, this is Castiel. Cas, this is Sammy."


	8. Chapter 8

When Dean dropped Castiel off at his house Gabriel and Balthazar were already there, and they were surprised to see him.

"Castiel, where were-? Wait, what happened to your face?" Castiel smiled at his little brothers concern. He shook his head and told Gabriel not to worry about it.

"Did Michael...?" Balthazar spoke up.

"No." Castiel returned sharply. They asked who did it, but Castiel wouldn't answer.

"But, Cassie-" Gabriel tried to interject.

"Stop Gabe, don't you have to go to soccer practice, where's Michael?" Castiel started walking over to the stairs, wanting to hide out in his room.

"Wait, Castiel, Michael's not here. I don't know when he'll be back, but I have to leave in ten minutes and I'm not allowed to drive." Gabriel was an eighth grader and Balthazar was a sophomore. Balthazar actually had his permit, but he still needed Michael to ride with him. Castiel looked back and saw that Gabriel was wearing his practice shirt and shorts. Castiel sighed.

"Go get your stuff."

Gabriel smiled and climbed past Castiel to get to his room. Castiel walked back over to the couch, which is where Balthazar was, and asked if he wanted to come.

"Why would I want to do that?" Balthazar asked. Castiel shrugged.

"I don't know, family bonding." Castiel responded. "I'll get you something." Balthazar smiled.

"Really?"

"No. Do you want to come with or not?" Castiel's brother shook his head. "Okay, whatever we'll be back in an hour and a half." Balthazar nodded, knowing how it would work. 

Gabriel came downstairs with a soccer bag slung over one shoulder and a hand full of socks, shin guards, and cleats. He told Castiel they had to leave right now or they'd be late. Castiel nodded and went to one of the many drawers in his kitchen. He fished out a pair of car keys and went through the garage door, Gabriel on his heels.

Castiel drove for several minutes before Gabe started talking.

"Michael's drinking again, isn't he?" Castiel looked over, a bit shocked. Michael was twenty one now, before he used to have a few beers every now and then but ever since he turned old enough to drink he's graduated to hard liquor, and he liked it a lot. He said he stopped a few months ago, but Castiel never truly believed it.

"Maybe." Castiel returned.

"Because he hit you?" Gabriel asked. Castiel shook his head.

"I don't know, Gabe."

There was more silence after that. Castiel was thinking about Michael's problem, about how maybe Michael turned into a day drunk. Castiel was spiraling downward and so was Micahael, how would Gabriel and Balthazar function without at least one of their brothers helping them? _I have to stop with the pills._ Castiel thought to himself. _I have to say goodbye to the bliss._ Castiel dropped Gabriel off. He knew he had an hour and a half to kill before Gabriel was done. He grabbed his phone and searched for a nearby coffee shop.

It was just one of those chain stores that everyone seemed to love. Castiel had asked the pretty brown haired barista what was her favorite drink and ordered that. The girl was definitely flirting with him, or at least he thought so, she was laughing too much and she batted her eyelashes, then she had seemed so honored when Castiel asked her for her opinion. Castiel smiled and went along with whatever the girl was going for, he even blushed when Meg (that was her name if the tag on her apron was correct) wrote her number on the paper cup. He would never call her of course, or even think about her later, Castiel could never find it in himself to like girls, or rather like them in the way everyone wanted him to.

He took the coffee to his car, Meg was absolutely right about the drink, it was delicious. Castiel already forgot what it was called, he remembers a mocha or carmel, maybe a frappe? All the orders got jumbled in his mind, he had paid attention to the order of the person in front of him, and he listened as the worker called out orders and gave them to the people around him. Castiel didn't care that he forgot the order, he didn't usually like to drink coffee, but he didn't really think his drink tasted like it had coffee in it.

Castiel decided to head back to where Gabriel was practicing. There was still about forty-five minutes left of the practice so Castiel thought he'd try to watch some of it, but as he looked around he saw many boys that wire the same clothes and even looked like Gabriel, and there were also teams practicing too far for Castiel to see. He sighed in defeat and pulled his phone out to read on one of the websites he had signed up with.

Time flied and soon enough Castiel was snapped out of his reading trance by a tapping on the window. He gasped and jumped in his seat only to find his brother at the car window. He laughed and motioned for Castiel to unlock the door. Castiel sighed and briefly thought about keeping him out there for a while, but he stared at Gabriel's sweaty, gross face and decided he might need the air conditioning. He rolled his eyes and unlocked the door. Gabriel threw his backpack over the front seats and smiled at Castiel.

"Why are you so happy?" Castiel asked. Gabriel shrugged and smiled some more.

"No reason." He responded, smirk still present on his face. Castiel laughed.

"Okay, fine, keep it to yourself." Gabriel sighed inwardly with a happy tone, then he turned on the radio and stayed silent for the rest of the way home.

 

When Castiel pulled into the garage and stepped out of the car he heard shouting. He quickly turned to Gabriel, who had wide eyes and a frightened expression on his face. Castiel could tell the yelling was Michael's, at first he thought they should just wait it out, but then he heard a scream- it was Balthazar's. Castiel ran to Gabriel and told him to stay in the car, he of course was asking over and over if Balthazar was okay, and Castiel only told him he can't go inside.

Castiel dashed through the door and ran into the living room. He saw Balthazar and Michael in the kitchen. Michael was standing over a fallen Balthazar, yelling mindless things and swinging his arm in the air. Beer was sloshing from the bottle in his hand and falling onto the ground and on Balthazar. Michael had a burst of anger and threw the glass bottle against a wall, making Balthazar flinch and Castiel jump.

"Stop it, Michael!" Castiel yelled as he charged forward and put himself in front of Balthazar. The boy had a red mark across his cheek. _Did Michel hit him?_ He looked up at his red faced brother.

"Castiel, I should've known you'd come back and take another brother of mine." Castiel shook his head and turned back to Balthazar, he pulled him up and ran a hand over his face.

"Balth, go outside with Gabe, start the car. Go." He gave Balthazar a little push toward the door and turned back to Michael making sure he couldn't run after the younger brother. "You hit him?" Castiel questioned angrily.

"You're taking away my brothers, I'm their guardian...you're taking away my fucking money." Michael's words were slurred and his breath reeked of booze.

"Your what?" Castiel asked.

"Get out of my way!" Michael shoved Castiel against the wall, Castiel fell, but got up and pulled Michael away from the door.

"Stop it, Michael. You're fucking drunk. You hit Balthazar. Stay back." Michael pushed him again. Castiel realized he was way out of his league and couldn't fight Michael with his bare hands. He stood up and quickly grabbed one of the decorative bowls that held fruit, he ran after Michael and swung the bowl as hard as he could. He closed his eyes, but when he reopened them he saw Michael on the ground with colored glass shards surrounding him. Michael was still conscious, so Castiel turned around grabbed his backpack and ran through the door that lead to the garage and jumped into the running car. Gabriel and Balthazar were looking at him with panic filled expressions.

"What happened, Castiel? Are you okay? Where's Michel?" Castiel saw the door start to open and he started shoving Balthazar's shoulder.

"Fucking drive!" He yelled.

"What!" Balthazar responded, he wasn't really the best driver in the world and he was panicked.

"Drive! Drive!" The door was now all the way open and Michael came stumbling out, there was blood dripping down his forehead and he was shouting again. Balthazar started pulling out (way to fast) and suddenly Castiel found himself glad he hadn't closed the garage door when he parked.

Balthazar's driving felt like a roller coaster ride as he turned out of the driveway. Castiel saw Michael stop in the garage and wave his fists at them, he looked like he was yelling, but Castiel couldn't hear him over the tires screeching and Gabriel's shouting. A minute seemed to pass before Castiel realized how far they had gotten.

"Pull the car over." He told Balthazar, calmer this time. Balthazar obliged and stopped, he looked back and Castiel got out of the car. "Get in the back, I'll drive." Balthazar looked up and him, then opened his door and Castiel took the wheel. He sucked in a breath and rested his head on the steering wheel.

"Are you okay, Cassie?" Gabriel asked in a voice that seemed to be coming from just a small child.

"Yeah," he paused and sat up. "Yeah, I'm fine, can you just go in my bag and give me my pill bottle." Gabriel nodded and handed him the plastic orange bottle. "Thanks." He had a huge headache and his side and face hurt, not to mention a lot of stress suddenly came down on him. He was wondering what to do, he didn't know how to take care of his brothers by himself.

"Are we going to be okay?" Gabriel asked with the same voice.

"I-I don't know guys. We just need to...get away for a while. Michael won't hurt you, he'll never hurt you again." Castiel's eyes connected with Balthazar's and the younger boy brushed his finger tips over the red mark on his cheek.

"Where are we going, Castiel?" Balthazar asked.

"I don't know... just... away." Castiel unscrewed the orange bottle and downed two pills. _That's four more left._ He handed the bottle back to Gabriel. "Can you put that away?" Gabe nodded and stuffed them back in the backpack.

"We're going to be alright." Castiel tried to assure them. He smiled at his brothers and returned back to the front. He sighed, took the car out of park, and started to drive.


	9. Chapter 9

Castiel drove his brothers and himself to a motel. It was just some crappy little place that was cheap enough for Castiel to afford, the man at the desk said that Castiel had to be a legal adult. He tried to lie, he was seventeen so he assumed he could pass as eighteen, but the man didn't buy it.

"I'm going to need to see some ID." The man deadpanned. Castiel sighed and unzipped his backpack. He didn't even have any ID on him. Castiel found a twenty dollar bill and slid it to the man, he only looked down at the money and gazed back at Castiel, emotionless.

"I think I'm eighteen." Castiel smiled. The man laughed and took the money.

"This buys one night of my _kindness._ You still have to to pay for the room. If you stay longer every night is another twenty." Castiel nodded, he knew he'd have to pull money from Michael's bank account. He had a credit card because Michael didn't like the idea of Castiel having to ask every time he need money. Castiel supposed it was Michael's mistake. 

"If anyone asks about me or my brothers, or anyone that looks like us, can you pretend we were never here." The man smiled but stuck out his hand. Castiel shook his head. "Really? The twenty couldn't cover it?" He sounded off-hinge, and he was. He was running away and paying off some sleazy motel manager because he didn't want his drunkard of a brother finding him. The man didn't remove his hand. "Jesus, okay." Castiel went into his backpack again and pulled out the rest of his cash- it was only ten dollars. The man looked down at the crumpled bill and squinted his eyes at Castiel.

"Do you believe your privacy is only worth ten dollars?" The man was by far the most manipulating person Castiel had ever met and he couldn't tell if he liked it or not.

"Listen, that's all I got on me." The mans face faltered, but only for a moment. "I'll get more, I just need the room."

"Fine, an extra ten every night for my silence, but if you only stay for this night, then it'll be bumped up to twenty, which means another ten on the final payment. Do you understand?" He was stern, Castiel found himself picturing this guy as a secret mobster in his free time or past.

"Yeah, deal." Castiel agreed. He sighed and stuck his hand out for the keys. The man smiled and turned around, he grabbed the keys off a rack, then dropped them in Castiel's palm.

"Thank you for your business, sir." Castiel rolled his eyes and went outside to get his brothers.

Gabriel and Balthazar were talking to each other about something Castiel couldn't hear. Gabriel had a bit of a blush on his cheeks and Balthazar was saying something with a smile. Castiel walked up and knocked on the hood. The boys stepped out of the car and looked at him questionably.

"What were you guys talking about in there?" Castiel asked.

"Nothing." Gabriel said quickly... a little too quickly. Castiel turned to Balthazar, he had a mischievous grin on his face.

"Gabe has a crush." Balthazar responded. Gabriel slapped Balthazar, but didn't respond. Castiel laughed.

"Oh yeah? Is that why you were all happy after practice?" Gabriel looked at the floor and nodded his head.

"Some of the guys said she was asking about me."

"What's her name?"

"Kali." Gabe answered. Castiel squinted in confusion at the name. "She's foreign." He added. Castiel smiled.

"Okay, well good for you, Gabe." He holds up the room keys. "You want to go inside?" The boys nodded and followed him to the room. Gabriel and Balthazar kept talking about Kali. Apparently Balthazar had seen her around and he confirmed that she was, as he put it, "hot". That's when Gabriel started talking about how she was also in advanced math and played soccer for his club, but didn't practice on the same days.

The boys entered the room and each of the younger brothers laid down on separate twin beds and flipped on the television. Castiel sighed and laid the room keys on one of the night stands. He set down his backpack, but pulled out his wallet.

"I'm going to go pull some money from the bank, both of you need to stay here, okay?" Gabriel furrowed his brows and sat up some.

"Isn't that from Mike's account?" He piped up. Castiel shrugged.

"It's a joined account." Balthazar smiled and rolled his eyes. "I'll see you in about thirty minutes. Remember, stay here, don't go outside." Gabriel nodded, but before Castiel could turn and leave, he spoke up again.

"Wait, what about clothes? I'm in my practice clothes." Castiel turned around again.

"We'll go out tomorrow, just wait till then, please." Gabriel seemed disappointed, but Castiel could tell he was trying to hide it. Gabe nodded anyway and returned to watching the television.

Castiel left the building and returned to the car. He was wondering about the license plates and if a Michael would try to find the brothers through them. He was also thinking about Gabriel and Balthazar's reactions to everything that was happening. Castiel himself felt like he'd start screaming and crying all at once if it weren't for his pills. _What the hell will happen when I run out?_ But his brothers were avoiding the problem, talking about girls, and watching TV _. Balthazar was hit! He had a red mark across his cheek!_ Castiel kept coming to the conclusion that it was all his fault, that everything was. _Michel told me that I was taking Balth and Gabe away, that's why he got so angry, that's why he hit Balthazar_.

Castiel started driving to an ATM, he wanted to make sure it was far enough from the motel that if Michael searched for them, he would have to look pretty hard. The ATM was outside of a random drug store and it was fifteen minutes away from their motel, and it was closer to another (better and more expensive) motel that he had hoped would draw his brother's attention away from him. He took out one thousand dollars. He thought it would be enough for extra clothes and their motel expenses. Michael of course would have some trouble paying for rent and food for a few weeks, maybe months, but all in all he'd be fine... he'd be even better if he kicked his drinking habit. Castiel drove back to the motel after he stuffed the money into his coat pocket.

Gabriel and Balthazar were still in the same position when Castiel returned. On the way back Castiel picked up some groceries, it was cheap and probably not too good for any human digestive system, but it would work, and that was all Castiel was going for now.


	10. Chapter 10

Gabriel and Balthazar both slept with Castiel. The bed was a twin and there was another one that was right next to the one they were on, but it just kind of happened. Castiel actually thought that Gabriel ended up in the same bed because he was afraid, which made him feel like shit, and Balthazar, well, Castiel didn't know why he didn't sleep in the other bed. Maybe he _was_ scared. 

In the morning Castiel had to push his brothers off of him. They groaned but quickly returned back to their sleeping positions. Castiel stood up and rubbed a hand through his hair, he sighed and decided he should take a shower. First he dug through his bag and took out his phone to check the time. It was around nine, Castiel planned against going to school today, he thought it would be the first place Michael would check once he sobered up. Castiel tossed his phone on the empty bed and took out the orange pill bottle. _I really shouldn't_. He stared at the bottle, he shook is head, then put back.

While he was in the shower Gabriel and Balthazar woke up, "Cassie?" He heard his brother call from the other room. He told them that he was in the shower and that he'd be out in a few minutes. When he came out Castiel put on his old clothes, he knew it wasn't very useful to take a shower, but he felt cleaner. He breathed out deeply sat down on one of the beds. He sat there for a while, then he realized Gabriel was staring at him.

"Gabe, what are you looking at?" Castiel turned to look at his younger brother.

"Your shirt- it's just- I don't remember it." Castiel looked down; it was Dean's shirt.

"A friend gave it to me." Castiel responded.

Balthazar shook his head. "Why did a friend give you his shirt?" Castiel rolled his eyes.

"God, because I spilled something on mine, why does it matter?." He was getting a little _too_ defensive.

"So he just like took off his shirt and gave it to you." Castiel threw his head back and groaned. _Not that I wouldn't mind that..._

"Obviously he gave me an extra." Castiel stood up and picked up his coat. "But speaking of shirts, maybe we should go shopping now, huh?" They all agreed and began to walk through to door. They were also talking about where they wanted to go.

They ended up going to a under appreciated clothing store that sold under appreciated brands that were just cheap enough for Castiel to afford. All three of them got a few outfits. Castiel didn't plan on staying away long, Michael had everything against him. He could easily say he kidnapped his brothers or tracked them down, not to mention Castiel, Balthazar, and Gabriel were all minors and the only reason they weren't put in Foster care was because Michael stepped in and said he'd be their legal guardian. If anyone found out that Michael was an abusive alcoholic Castiel and his brothers would be separated... no one wanted that.

After they returned to the motel Castiel gave the keys to Balthazar and told him to go to the room with Gabe. Castiel walked to the front desk and saw the man standing there, when their eyes connected, the man smiled. "Ah, hopefully you're here to pay. I was afraid you were going to leave, but your room wasn't empty and it appears you've been shopping." Castiel nodded.

"How much do I owe you for the night?"

"Well, the room plus ten unless you're staying another night, then I could charge you for the next night and all you'll have to do tomorrow is return the keys, if you don't stay longer that is." Castiel nodded and took out the money.

"So, one hundred and six for the room, twenty for your _kindness_ , and ten for your silence?" Castiel asked taking the money out. The man laughed.

"Oh, and here I thought you were a broke runaway." The man was looking at the money, which Castiel quickly put back after grabbing the hundred thirty six dollars. He handed it to the man. "Was it your brother who was looking for you?" Castiel furrowed his eyebrows at the man. _How the hell did he know that?_

"Wha-"

"Someone came in looking for a person that fit your description, he said that you took his brothers." Castiel wanted to say something, but couldn't find his words. "I'm guessing you're too young to marry him, and he was too young to be your father." Castiel nodded. "So, brother?"

"Yeah."

"Was he the one who gave you those bruises?" Castiel almost forgot how his face looked.

"No."

"How about that broken rib?" Castiel's eyes widened.

"How did you-?" The man laughed.

"You have a slight limp, not bad enough for a leg injury, but because of your strides the muscles in your back pull at the sore spot, making you limp." Castiel was taken aback by the mans sudden knowledge of the medical field and he was taken aback by the hint of caring he gave off. 

"What? Were you a doctor before you started running this _nice_ motel?" Castiel asked. The man chuckled.

"No, but I fought a lot when I was younger. Had a few broken ribs myself. A doctor once told me that's why I was limping." Castiel nodded. "So, did your brother do that to you?"

"No, he made it worse, but he wasn't that same person who broke my rib gave me my bruises." The man nodded, understanding somehow.

"Well, have a nice day, sir." Castiel returned with the same thing and walked off, although was was a bit confused about the whole exchange that had just happened. 

Gabriel was in the shower when Castiel returned. Balthazar was waiting for his turn and watching _The Titanic_. Castiel sat down and laid his head back. Castiel found himself extremely tired even though it was only slightly past three in the afternoon. He sighed and reached out for his backpack, he snatched his pill bottle and unscrewed the top, he dumped the contents into his hand. There were three left, he had taken one while his brothers were trying on clothes. He wanted to stop taking them, he really did, but he couldn't, it was like he was trapped under a spell. He put two of the pills back and swallowed the other one. After that he fell asleep.

 

Castiel woke up the next morning with a terrible ache in his rib. Gabriel had fallen asleep on top of him, which did something weird to his already hurt side. He struggled to get out from under his brother, but once he did he checked the time. He had planned something before he went to sleep. He knew he was running out of pills, but he also was well aware that he needed the sensation the drugs gave him to function with his brothers, to be their guardian. He took another pill and grabbed a piece of paper, quickly he wrote that he'd be back and put it somewhere his brothers could find. Them he took his backpack and left.

He drove to his school, he wasn't going to stay, he just wanted to ensure he'd be able to feel the way he had now for longer than the pills could last. Ash was where he always was, he was looking out in the distance, just staring at the sky. _He's thinking_. Castiel knew the look. He got out of his car and sauntered over to where Ash was sitting.

"Hey, Castiel." Ash smiled. He pronounced each syllable of Castiel's name so it sounded more like Cass-tea-el, with the a little spaces in between. "Haven't seen you in a while, thought you just stopped doing whatever it is you do." Castiel sat down next to the other boy.

"No, I just-" he didn't know what to say. "Are you still trying to get me to try, you know, that shit?" Ash laughed. He knew what Castiel meant, he always did, which Castiel thought was a little weird given that they haven't known each other for that long. Still Castiel enjoyed the feeling of not having to explain everything he was thinking about at all times. 

"It's called weed, Castiel, you're smart enough to know that."

"Whatever, Ash. Is that a yes?"

"What made you change your mind?" Ash started to dig through his bag.

"Honestly, I don't know." Castiel responded. Ash looked over his shoulder at Castiel, he knew there was something he wasn't saying, but he didn't push it.

"Here you go." He pulled out the small bag and handed it to Castiel. "Free of charge for the only friend that can keep up with my intellect." Castiel smiled and stuffed the bag into his pocket.

"Thanks." Castiel stood up and started heading to his car.

"You're not going to school?" Castiel turned back and shook his head. Ash was visibly confused, he thought that Castiel seemed to almost like school. Ash thought that there was something wrong with the other boy.

Castiel walked to his car, his hand touched the cold metal only slightly before he froze from a simple voice.

"Cas?"

Castiel didn't turn around, but he knew who it was. There was only one person who called him Cas.


	11. Chapter 11

Castiel didn't move, he knew Dean Winchester was behind him, the very same Dean Winchester that cared for no reason.

"Cas." He heard again. This time he released the breath he didn't realize he was holding in, then he turned around, meeting confused green eyes. Dean looked hurt...and that made Castiel feel even sadder than he already was. He didn't like making people feel disappointed, yet that's all he seemed to be good at. 

"Hello, Dean." He returned in a small voice. Castiel wanted to run away, to just get in his car a drive back to his brothers. _Why is he here?_

"You didn't come to school yesterday." Dean said. "And you're leaving now? Cas, this isn't like you." Castiel frowned.

"And how exactly would you know how I act?" Dean looked down at the ground, almost as if he were hiding.

"Because..." He trailed off, it seemed like he almost didn't have a response. because you're my tutor." His voice sounded different somehow, not cocky or usual. Castiel shook his head. He didn't know how to respond, and to be honest, he didn't want to respond. He didn't want to get into a conversation that would make him tell his whole fucked up story to Dean Winchester, only to get pity and his crush to never look him straight in the eyes ever again. Castiel decided it was best to leave without an explanation than never see those candied apple eyes in his life again.

Castiel opened the door to his car and got in. He only turned his keys in the ignition before the passenger side door opened and Dean sat down beside him.

"What are you doing?" Castiel asked surprised.

"What's wrong?" His voice was stern, asking for answers. 

"Get out of my car."

Dean sucked in a deep breath. "Castiel, please tell me. Something isn't right." The blue eyed boy looked over. His face was hard set.

"Dean, listen, I have to get my brothers, and you have to get back to school. Leave."

"You have brothers?" Dean switched the conversation. 

"Yes, two, and I need to get back to them."

"What are their names?"

"Gabriel and Balthazar."

"Got any other siblings?" Castiel sighed laid his head back.

"Why do you care?" Dean shook his head and reached over, laying a hand on Castiel's knee. The boy tried to hide how flustered he truly got from the other's touch.

"Do you?" He sounded like he was trying to avoid what they were talking about before, or perhaps he was trying to loosen Castiel up, slowly break down walls so he could get Castiel to actually open up to him. Castiel looked at Dean's hand, then up at his face.

"Yeah. An older brother."

"What's his name?" Castiel shook his head again.

"Dean, I don't want to talk about him. Please get out so I can go." Dean sat back and crossed his arms.

"No. Take me with you." Castiel gaped at him.

"Get out, Dean."

"Why'd Ash give you pot?" Castiel stared for a moment, then gave a huff and turned on the radio. He quickly switched it to some loud rock station and looked away. He put his hands on the wheel.

"No talking." Dean didn't say anything, he just seemed unsure.

Castiel drove in silence (with the exception of too loud rock music) till they got to the motel. Dean was quick to ask why they stopped here. Castiel didn't answer, he just ignored Dean, which was extremely hard considering his feelings toward the boy, and walked to his room.

While Castiel walked he noticed something different, he turned around, Dean was there, but that wasn't the thing he was paying attention to, there was an extra car in the lot- this could've been nothing, but Castiel recognized the car. _Shit. No. Seriously?_   He started running to his room. He heard Dean yelling behind him.

When he made it to his door his started knocking furiously. He hadn't taken his key with him because he knew his brothers were going to be there.

"Cas, what are you doing?" Dean asked.

"Gabe! Balthazar! Open up!" Castiel yelled over and over again.

Finally the door opened, but neither Balthazar or Gabriel stood in the doorway. It was Michael. _Fuck!_

Castiel turned to Dean. "Wait in the car, please." Dean could tell he wasn't himself.

"No, Cassie, invite your boyfriend inside." Michel's tone was condescending and humorous.

"Michael," Castiel responded. He couldn't even try to hide the slight blush of embarrassment across his cheeks, and he hated himself for that. He turned back to Dean. "Go back to the car." Castiel looked pass Michael and saw his brother's figures in the room with wide eyes and scared faces.

Castiel pushed past his brother and went to Gabriel and Balthazar. "Hey, are you guys okay? He didn't hurt you, did he?" They shook their heads.

"He was asking about you." Gabriel returned timidly. Castiel nodded and told his brothers to follow him.

When they got to the door Michael was looking at them.

"Where do you think you're going?" He asked. Dean looked between them, worried, mostly. Castiel ignored him and directed his brothers outside near Dean.

"Guys, go to the car."

"What?" Michael said beside them.

"Dean, can you make sure they stay in the car, please." Dean glanced quickly between them for a moment. It was obvious Michael was getting angry, the brothers looked scared, and Castiel was holding something back, whether that be emotions or anything else.

"What's wrong? What's going on?" Dean asked. Castiel looked at him with pleading eyes.

"Dean, can you just-" he pushed his brothers out the door, and himself in front of Michael. Dean sighed and started walking back, Castiel reached out however, Dean looked back confused by the arm that stopped him. "Wait," he put his hand in his pocket and took out a pair of keys. He placed them in Dean's hand. "Just in case." He whispered. Dean looked unsure, but nodded and walked off with Balthazar and Gabriel in tow.

Castiel saw them get far enough away before he closed the door and turned to his brother.

"So what? Did you think you and your little lover could kidnap my brothers?"

"Dean and I are just friends. And you don't even care about them." Michael laughed a bit then turned to Castiel, he looked like he was about to say something. "You hit Balthazar!" His voice rose. "I was putting up with your shit so they didn't have to. Jesus Michael, you don't deserve them."

"And you do?" He returned. "You and that boy? Do you think that you can protect them? Shelter them? You stole from me and you're lucky I'm not going to the cops. Do you know what they'd do? They'd give my brothers to me, just like they did before, and then they'd probably toss you in some boys home." Castiel wasn't sure of himself, right now he wanted to take his pills, he wanted to take as much as he could fit his mouth, he wanted to down the whole bottle, _if only there were more than one pill._

"Michael, stop being an asshole! You can't take them away if your just going to drink and beat them." Michael rapidly stuck his arms out and grabbed Castiel by the shirt, then slammed him into the wall. Castiel groaned and tried to push his brother away, only Michael threw him to the ground and started punching him.

"Do you think you know!" Michael yelled. "You have no idea what's going on! No idea of how to handle it!" Another punch came down on Castiel. He tasted the blood seeping between is lips and felt some dripping down his nose and chin. Michael bawled his fist again and brought it down, yet Castiel never felt it. Instead he looked up to see Dean Winchester holding his brother down. He sat up trying to ignore his extreme headache.

"Run, Cas!" Dean yelled, Michael quickly flipped Dean over and threw a punch. _He's hurting others now, it's not just us, why does he keep hurting everyone I've ever loved?_ Castiel got up and ran toward the pair, tackling his older brother. Dean got up and tugged Castiel off, dragging him behind as he ran out the door. They rushed to the car, Castiel looked back and saw Michael just coming out of the room. Castiel and Dean jumped in the car, Balthazar was behind the wheel.

"Go! Go!"


	12. Chapter 12

Balthazar didn't know where to go, not until Dean finally gave him directions to his house. He said they could stay there till they found out what they were going to do, which they had no idea of themselves. Castiel was so deep in thought about his brothers and Michael and what was happening he didn't realize Dean was holding his hand. He looked down at their intertwined fingers and wondered how on earth he hadn't noticed before. _It was probably when we were running out, he kind of did drag me behind him. Wait, but why didn't he let go?_ Castiel actually didn't care why he didn't let go, but he couldn't peel his eyes away.

Dean eventually noticed, "Sorry," he said sheepishly and pulled away. Castiel frowned, wanting to tell him he would love for him to hold his hand longer, or hold him in general, or even just to be near him for the rest of his life.

Castiel felt something drip from his face and land on his pants. He looked down and saw red. "Shit." He cursed wiping his chin quickly so the blood wouldn't fall anymore. He knew he had a nose bleed, and more then likely a busted lip...again. He has had the worst two weeks of his life, but the only good side was that now he could talk to Dean Winchester, although he knew too about Castiel to love him- and there was that whole Dean Winchester is straight, which especially sucked considering the way Castiel felt about men. He had been beaten up before by Crowley & Co. and Michael, but not that bad, not that often... his whole lift was going to shit.

"Cassie," Gabriel spoke up after a moment of silence. His tone was weak- scared.

"Yeah, Gabe?" He asked.

"What's going to happen?" He questioned. That was what everyone was wondering, Gabriel, Balthazar, Dean, hell Castiel didn't even know. "We aren't going back to Michael, are we?"

"No." Castiel returned fast. He wouldn't let that happen, he would run away, he'd hide, he do anything he could before Michael could get to them. "I just- I don't know what we're going to do...yet." He added the last part to try and assure his brothers. He didn't know if he'd ever have a plan.

"I'll help," Dean said from next to him. Castiel looked over. "I mean, like, in whatever way I can." Castiel nodded, silently thanking him.

A few minutes passed where all of them said nothing. Gabriel was scared, Castiel was bleeding, Dean was confused, and Balthazar- well- Balthazar seemed completely numb. They drove up to the salvage yard, Bobby wasn't anywhere to be seen, so they just stepped out of the car and went inside. Gabe and Balthy sat down on the couch, looking to Castiel for guidance. Dean, however, grabbed Castiel's arm and told the other two they'd be right back.

Dean took him into the bathroom, asked him to sit on the toilet seat (the lid was down), and then he started to rummage through the cabinet under the sink.

"What are you doing?" Castiel asked quietly. Dean pulled out a rag and soaked it in water. He rung it out and then went back over to Castiel. He brought the cloth to Castiel's face. Dean gave a few rubs before Castiel grabbed his hand and stood up. "I can clean myself up, you know." Dean frowned but didn't give the cloth to Castiel. "Dean?" His tone was confused. Dean looked away, staring at the ground.

"How long was he...?" Dean couldn't finish the sentence, his voice was quiet and unlike his usual self-confident facade.

"Dean," Castiel didn't want to talk about it...he never wanted to talk about it. In fact Castiel had been avoiding the problem for the five years he's lived with his brother. It all started happening when his parents died.

Michael wasn't drinking a lot when he turned eighteen and took his brothers in, but he'd still shove him around -it almost seem playful to someone who didn't hear the way Michael yelled at him or said their parents were dead because of him. Castiel never believed that lie, and looking back he should've realized that was the start of all this shit. When Michael turned twenty one the physical abuse followed when he would drink too much...

Although somewhere in Castiel's mind he almost wanted to thank his brother, he'd never be standing this close to the love of his life without him.

"Him and Crowley..." Dean continued, still averting his eyes. "How the hell did you make everything seem okay?" Castiel shook his head and started to pull the rag from Deans hand. Dean held on and Castiel decided to give up. Dean brought the wet cloth back up to Castiel's face.

"I had something to hope for...I think...I mean...I honestly have no idea." Castiel knew Dean was that something, of course he was looking directly in those emerald green eyes, so he had to cover his ginormous crush on the boy up by using his natural born awkwardness. Dean can't help but let his lips twitch up to a smirk and Castiel smiles, but regrets it because his face (mostly his lip) starts throbbing.

Dean pulls the rag away to reveal it's covered in blood. He washes it, rings it out, then goes back to wiping Castiel's face off. "You're a mess," Dean laughs under his breath, cleaning what Castiel could only think was the last of the blood from his face.

"Your pretty busted up too," Castiel joins in a light chuckle, raising his hand to brush against Deans cheek. Castiel suddenly gets over come by a powerful feeling of guilt. "Sorry about that." Castiel's fingers stay touching Deans cheekbone just because he can't believe he's this close to him. Because he can smell what Castiel can only describe as what he'd imagine Dean would smell like; leather, motor oil, and almost too much cologne. Castiel thinks it's an odd combo for a teenager to have on him, but considering where he lives and the aroma of the house that he's now in, it's almost expected. Castiel also stays where he is just because he knows he'll never be this close to Dean, he probably will never be able to feel his surprisingly smooth skin. And because he knows he will never be able see Deans eyes this close up. There's the perfect shade of green that Castiel assumes a painter can only dream of having in their color palette, and then there's the tiny flakes of gold which Castiel actually pulls back once he notices. It reminds his of the liquor Michael would drink; for some reason it had tiny flecks of gold on the bottom, and they'd float to the top whenever Mike would take a sip.

Dean notices the gesture and wants to ask why he pulled away (if he's being totally honest he loved the feel of Castiel's slightly callused but incredibly soft fingers on his cheek. He also wants to feel Castiel's hand in his own, because again, being brutally honest, he's been noticing himself staring at Cas and getting a heavy/hot/numb feeling in his chest and body and hands...but mostly head. W _hy the hell do feel like I want to kiss my tutor?_ That was the question he was struggling to find the answer to right now -that and, _is he even gay? Or bi? And even if by the small chance he is, why the hell would he like me?)_ yet, instead of exploring these questions, asking them aloud, or just going on impulse, Dean Winchester decides to stick with the last thing Castiel said.

"It's not your fault." He paused. "I don't blame you if that's what you think."

Castiel wasn't thinking about that, he just felt sorry Dean got dragged into this.

A few seconds pass before Castiel speaks again. "I should probably go out and talk to my brothers." Dean understands and let's him go. Castiel wishes this private moment could last forever, just him and Dean, semi-well and close together for the rest of their lives, but he knows better, and he could sense his brothers uneasiness when they stepped into the house a couple of minutes ago.

Dean lingers for a moment, to put the rag in a laundry basket and curse himself for being a coward (he really wanted to slam his lips against Cas' after their stare lasted more than two seconds). Dean sighs, pushes his fingers through his hair, and goes out to join Castiel and his brothers.


	13. Chapter 13

Castiel's brothers were quietly talking to themselves about what was happening while Dean was in the bathroom with him. They were nervous and confused. They didn't know what was happening or what would happen.

"We're safe right?" Gabriel asked his brother in a hushed tone.

"I think so, if Castiel took us here it has to be, he wouldn't hurt us." Balthazar looked at his brother and took a deep breath. "He isn't Michael." Gabriel nodded and twisted his fingers together, his knee was bouncing up and down with anxiety, and he was biting his lip. "Gabe, what's wrong?" Balthazar asked. The younger brother looked up, his eyes were filled with fear.

"Are we going to get separated?"

Balthazar didn't know if they were or not. He knew that not many Foster families could take in three teenagers, and even if they tried to stay together Castiel would turn eighteen and the he could file for custody, but considering how that went for them, there's going to be some pretty big doubts in the judges mind. Plus before Castiel turged eighteen would allow time for them to be separated or god knows what else. Balthazar -in the end- decided it was better for Gabriel not to know about those facts though.

"No," it was a bit unsure, "no," he said firmer. "We are going to be okay, we are going to be together." Gabe seemed a little bit better when he nodded his head.

Balthazar tried not to think of Michael. Or the hitting. Or the moving away. Or the two times Castiel ran into the car and yelled for him to drive. He didn't want to think of it. Had he known Michael was hitting Castiel? No. Was there part of him that thought there was a chance? Well, he knew Michael could get _rough_ sometimes. But had he ever thought Michael could hit him across the face? No. Yet it had happened. That was quite possibly the exact moment he decided he despised his brother. He wondered how long Michael had been hitting Castiel. He couldn't believe Castiel stood up to Michael, stood between them acting as a shield.

Castiel came out of the bathroom a minute later, his face was clean, and he had a neutral expression. Balthazar and Gabriel looked over, he gave a small smile. Moments after, Dean came out and told the three of them that he was going to go talk to Bobby. Castiel nodded and sat down in one of the empty chairs. He sighed and leaned his elbows on the table, then rested his chin in his hands. He didn't know what to do.

None of them knew what to do.

Suddenly a wave of anxiety and complete and utter hopelessness washed over Castiel. He was used to the feeling, sure, he'd experienced small doses of it from time to time, but not like the shear force that just hit him, he hadn't expirences this harsh of a feeling for a long while. He panicked and his heart was doing this heavy, fast pounding that made his chest feel like it was vibrating. He sucked in a deep breath, trying to act natural as he stood up and told his brothers he had to get his bag from the car.

Castiel was fast to get to his car and take his backpack. He dug through it and took the familiar orange bottle out. He shook it, knowing there was only one more pill left. He looked at it, the fear was digging it's tendrils into the back his mind, he sighed and shook his head. He knew it was wrong, he knew he shouldn't, but he just wanted to feel calm again. He just wanted to feel like he could control his own fucking life for once. He wanted to feel like he could actually help his brothers...

He unscrewed the cap and downed the pill.

He was disappointed in himself. He knew he couldn't control himself, the pills were doing that. Or maybe Michael had been the one controlling him... them, for so long.

_Doesn't matter_. Castiel thought to himself. I'm outta pills and I'm not gonna see Michael again. The last sentence got across his mind before he heard a footstep crunch on the gravel behind him. He glanced out of the cother of his eye to see Dean. Castiel sucked in a deep breath and tucked the empty medicine bottle in his bag. He turned his head to Dean, almost as a sort of greeting. Dean started to walk closer.

"I thought you stopped." It was about the pills. Of course it was about the god dammed pills, _why the hell does he even care what I do?_ Castiel gave an exasperated huff of breath.

"Yeah, well..." He trailed off, waving his hand in the air. Dean stepped closer.

"Do your brothers know?" Castiel closed his eyes and groaned.

"Doesn't matter. That was the last one." Dean was right next to him now, he looked in his eyes for a moment, then leaned back against the hood of Castiel's beat up car. He stuck out his hand, which recived a confused glare from Castiel. The meds were kicking in and his mind was getting a bit fuzzy. "What?" The word came out harsher than intended, but in the scheme of things Castiel didn't quite care.

"Give me the bottle."

Castiel huffed and reached into the pocket of his backpack to pull out an empty orange bottle. Dean snatched it up and dropped it to the floor, Castiel was wondering what he was doing and was about to ask before Dean's boot came down on it, sending little cracked orange plastic shards flying.

"That was unnecessary." Castiel said. Dean shrugged and stuck his hand out again. "What now?" Castiel asked. "I don't have anymore pills, or anymore bottles for you to crush." Dean looked over like he didn't buy it. "Seriously, Dean." Castiel put his arms up to show his innocence.

"The pot, Cas." He deadpanned. Castiel had a moment of awe because he had forgotten all about the herb. He went back into his pack and pulled out a plastic Baggie filled with what looked like oragano. Castiel placed it in Dean's outstretched hand.

"I don't think it crushes easily." Castiel told him. Dean rolled his eyes.

"I'm going to burn it." Dean returned, pocketing the substance.

"Isn't that what you're trying to stop me from doing?" Dean looked at him like he was an idiot.

"Cas, go back to your brothers."

Castiel went to turn, in fact he did, a little. He only got about 90 degrees around before he turned back to Dean, his eyes looked sad.

"Are you going to leave?" He asked. Dean didn't understand.

"What?"

"Are. You. Going. To. Leave." Dean furrowed his brows.

"No, Cas. No, I'm not. I'll be right behind you, okay?" Castiel nodded and turned back to the house, walking toward the door.

_He's high_. Dean thought as part of his heart ached to have seen Castiel with that lost, hopeless face he had on. He didn't want Castiel to ever look like that ever again.


	14. Chapter 14

Dean went back inside to find Castiel and his brothers leaning on the table. They were smiling despite their awful situation and all Dean could wonder was how they were like this. How they weren't falling apart. Castiel looked up and flashed a small smile towards Dean. Not that he would ever admit it aloud, but Dean Winchester thought Castiel was adorable. The way he got flustered, or how he talked, even when he wasn't meaning to be cute, he was. His laugh and his smile had to be the thing Dean loved the most about him.

"Are you guys hungry?" Dean asked. Balthazar and Gabriel perked up, showing that the answer was yes without announcing it verbally. Castiel looked between his brothers.

"Yeah we could probably eat," he nodded. Dean was about to turn, "Here, I'll help you." Dean watched him stand and then lead him to the kitchen.

Dean started pulling out ingredients to make sandwiches; bread, knife, jelly, and peanut butter. "No allergies, right?" Dean questioned as he held up the brown jar. Castiel nodded and started taking out slices of bread. Dean stood next to him and took four of the eight pieces. Castiel started unscrewing the jelly jar. Dean looked at him, _he seems pretty calm, probably because of the pill he took earlier_. Dean wanted to know about his drug use, about everything that had hurt him to make sure it wouldn't again. Dean figured there was a better chance of him talking now than any other time.

"So, why'd you start to take the pills?" Castiel looked over to Dean. He was a little too focused on spending peanut butter on a slice of bread than he needed to be, probably milking the reason not to look at Cas. Castiel briefly stopped what he was doing, then returned to scooping jelly out with his knife. Castiel didn't answer for a short span of time and Dean thought he might've over-stepped.

"At first it was for the pain, obviously. They were prescribed, I didn't buy them off the black market or anything. But I guess when the pain faded I just wanted to be calm for once." The response was quiet, but Dean heard it just fine. He furrowed his brows and gave a short glance toward the other boy.

"What do you mean?" Castiel sighed. It was hard to explain, sort of, especially to someone who hasn't experienced anxiety like he had.

Calm was only a temporary state for Castiel. The pills almost made every feeling of dread he had disappear. He constantly thought of how he would mess up, or fail, or make a fool of himself. He lived in the future, wondering what was going to happen and worrying how he'd fuck it up, but he also lived in the past, thinking of everything he did wrong in his life.

"I don't know, Dean." That was the best response he could muster up. He went back to spreading the jelly. Dean looked over with confused eyes and a shaking head. _What does that mean?_ He thought. After they spread a nice helping of their ingredients on two slices of bread they switched sides. Dean brought the peanut butter over to Castiel's side and Cas brought the jelly to Dean's. They began to spread the other ingredient on the clear slice of bread.

Dean started thinking about Castiel and feeling at peace with the drug he took. "You don't feel calm?" Dean's words came out awkward and slow, like he was thinking at the same time he was talking. Castiel paused.

"Well I do now." Castiel smiled as he returned to putting jelly on the half of bread that Dean hadn't smeared peanut butter on.

"But normally, like at school and when you're not high." Castiel shrugged.

"I guess. I don't know. I kind of just always feel anxious." Dean looked over, his eyes were wide with surprise and disbelief. He looked sad, but Castiel just shook his head.

"How long?" Dean asked, voice in an awe-struck tone. Castiel asked what he meant by that. "How long have you been _anxious_." He spit the word out like he hated it. Castiel wanted to tell him that it was just a word, that it couldn't be blamed for what Castiel had to face.

"It was always with me, but it got worse after we moved in with Michael, and after Crowley's gang started picking on me."  Dean still seemed like he couldn't believe it. Castiel finished spreading the jelly on the slices, pressed them together, and then cut them at a diagonal. He leaned back against the counter and waited for Dean to finish what he was doing.

"Why did you move in with Michael in the first place?" Castiel lolled his head back and sighed.

"Our parents died a few years back. Michael wasn't eighteen yet though so we were all put in Foster homes, it was only for a few months. All of us were separated and none of us liked that, so when Mike was old enough he filed for custody." Dean nodded his head.

"Why'd you go?"

"We were alone -with other people. I think we all just wanted to be together again. We didn't know it would end up so horribly."

"But if he was abusive-"

"He wasn't." Castiel interjected, eyes reopening. "Not really, not at first. He would yell a lot, but he only started hitting when he was twenty one."

"Jesus, Cas..." Castiel shook his head.

"It wasn't that bad."

"Have you seen yourself? It looks like it was that bad." Suddenly there was a hand on Castiel's cheekbone. Castiel looked down and saw a pair of green eyes. He felt his breath catch in his throat. _Those are the eyes I love_. For a brief second of clarity he felt a overwhelming cloud realization. He had just confessed some of his deepest secrets to Dean. _Why did I do that?_ But then his high came back and he didn't care, however a whole other feeling came across him.

_Want_.

He _wanted_ Dean Winchester. He felt a need to draw him closer and lean against him, brushing his fingers through the others boys auburn hair. He wanted never to leave his side. To never leave where they were right now. He wanted _this_. A simple touch, comfortable and familiar (although of course this was one of the few times their skin has come in contact with each other's). He wanted to feel Deans freckled cheeks beneath his finger pads. Honestly, Castiel just wanted Dean, every part of him, good or bad. _Now if only Dean felt the same way._

Castiel grabbed Deans wrist, bringing it down and away from his face. He savored the warmth of Deans skin in his hand for the second they touched, then dropped it, trying to act normal. He and Dean were growing closer, they might even technically be able to call each other friends, if not, they weren't just a tutor and a learner anymore. They were something else... and Castiel didn't want to ruin whatever it was with his emotions.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Gabriel and Balthazar ate their sandwiches with Dean and Castiel. Dean was awkward with the two younger brothers, not knowing them well enough or really at all. For the most part they were silent, until they were done eating, then Dean told Castiel's brothers they could watch tv.

Dean asked Castiel if he had all his books from school.

"Yeah, why?" He responded.

"Your still my tutor, right?" Castiel nodded. "Good, because I'm still failing English, and I'm not doing so hot in math." _I'm sure you're hot in everything._ Suddenly Castiel became aware of what he was thinking and wondered if he had said it a loud. Dean didn't look any different so he supposed he had stayed silent.

"Okay, well, my backpack is outside," he went to turn.

"We could just share." Dean's voice made him look back. Dean seemed a bit flustered, and his hand was rubbing the back of his neck. He looked up and locked eyes with Castiel. "Or -or not, I mean whatever's good for you." Castiel nodded.

"Sure."

Dean smiled and told him to wait by the table. He went to get his books and when he came back Castiel was looking down at his hands. Dean set his math and English stuff down and pulled out a chair. He sat close to Castiel. They weren't on top of each other, but their shoulders and knees touched so they both could easily see the textbook that was in front of them.

Castiel liked the closeness; the slight warmth radiating from Dean's skin. _It's nice_ , he thought to himself.

"So, where'd you guys leave off?" Castiel asked. He looked over at Dean to realize that he was already staring back.

"What?" Dean seemed like he got snapped out of a trance.

"I haven't been in English or Math," Castiel reminded him, "so what are you guys working on?" Dean made a face that was a mix between thinking and disgust. Castiel was familiar with this look however, it was just about every kids face when they thought of school.

"Um, we have to write a summary of _1984_ , and then we have to write about the theme, and I think for the last part we have to compare the book to an excerpt from that other book we read....what was that?" Castiel had to think for a second. He had read so many books, and he was a little overwhelmed by information Dean had given him. _I have to make up all of that?_ But then the title came to his mind.

" _Fahrenheit 451_?"

"Yeah, yeah. That one."

"Did they give you the excerpt?" Dean nodded his head and started going through his backpack, trying to find the handout. He got it and showed it to Castiel. It was crumpled and covered in messy annotations. He read it over and decided to start with the comparison.

 

 

 

Dean was slumped against the table and mostly just listening to the television show Gabriel and Balthazar were watching.

"Dean, do you even care about school?" Castiel asked, closing his book and pushing it away from him so he could put himself in a similar position as Dean. They were looking at each other, their faces only a few inches apart. Dean shook his head.

"No, I'm just going to end up running the auto shop when I graduate. Not like I can get a real job." He paused and moment, but before Castiel could try to tell him he could get a job, or do whatever he wanted, he started talking again. "Not like I want a real job. Wear a monkey suit and have Big Brother watching." Castiel laughed at his joke and rested with a smile on his lips.

"What do you want to do then?" Castiel asked. Dean hummed with a thought.

"I think I'd like to fish." Castiel raised an eyebrow. "Get a house on the lake, walk out on the dock in the morning and relax. Fish." Castiel nodded. He imagined himself with Dean, although he didn't particularly know how to fish.

"Sounds lonely." Castiel ended up returning.

"No." Dean picked himself up. "I wouldn't be alone." Castiel squinted in confusion.

"Sam?"

"No. He'd probably be off at some Ivy League college. I wouldn't have to worry about him."

"Who would you be with then?"

For what had to have been shorter than it seemed, they stared at each other. Dean had an unreadable look on his face. Castiel was confused. A slight brush of pink was across both of their cheeks, for an unsaid reason that they both knew in the back of their mind. That's when Dean broke the gaze and looked down.

"I don't know, Cas." He brought his eyes back up and shrugged. "You could come." Castiel huffed.

"I don't know how to fish." Dean rolled his eyes.

"That's not all I would do. Plus I could teach you." He paused, a wave of thought rolling over him. He broke out into a smile. "I'd be your tutor." He said it in a certain way that made the comment funny. Castiel smiled and shook his head. "Hey, I'm hilarious." Dean quipped. _You're adorable_ , Castiel thought.

"I'm sure." He responded. Dean laughed and rubbed a hand over his face.

"What time is it?" He asked. Castiel grabbed his phone and clicked the home button.

"Um, just about three."

"Oh, shit, I gotta get Sam." Castiel nodded and stood up. "Just, stay here, and like watch tv or something. I'll be right back." Once again he nodded and watched as Dean grabbed his jacket and headed outside. He sent one last look at Castiel before closing the door. Castiel sighed and started walking to where his brothers were.

They were watching _Star Wars_.


End file.
